I was 18 years old the first time my parents took me to Las Vegas. The whole family went for cousin Andrea's wedding to Carl. I was excited for both reasons, to see Vegas for the first time and to see all of the family of course. Ruiz family weddings are always a blast and full of memories. Including mine, which I also held in Vegas in 2006. Only difference is that I didn't have the advantage of living there like Andrea and Carl. But after my first visit back then in September of 1996, I hoped one day that I would be able to call it home.
My family and I stayed at the old Hacienda Hotel, which is where Mandalay Bay now stands. Not being of age to gamble, my brother and cousins still managed to have some fun just by sightseeing and well hitting up the hotel arcade (haha). Hell, even just having a room to ourselves to hang out for a bit was fun enough. I remember my cousin Isabella and I used to talk about we couldn't wait the few short years until we turned 21 to go back and do the whole rite of passage of drinking (legally *hehe*) and gambling for the first time. Granted, she would turn 21 shortly before me, but we still were excited to look forward to the day we could return without restrictions.
One of my best friends, Cindy, lived nearby at the time in Kingman, Arizona. Her family had to move there at the start of our senior year of high school, but we kept in touch. Kingman is about a 2 hour drive from Vegas, so if I'm not mistaken, I believe by then her family had made a few recreational visits by the fall of '96. Soon, we started talking about making plans to live there together with her older sister Priscilla. It was pretty much the closest metropolitan area other than Phoenix where they would have opportunity to settle into a nice career and establish a living. Up until then, I always dreamed that I would end up living near or on the beach, one of Southern Californa's coastal cities. I grew up spending nearly every summer visiting Bolsa Chica, Seal and Huntington Beaches and wanted to just live there. But for some reason after that visit, I thought Vegas could be even greater. Cindy, Priscilla and I did our homework and figured with 3 of us in an apartment, it couldn't be that hard to hold down rent once we had jobs. So the plan was to carry on with our lives at home, save our money, get cars and start making waves to find work out there. One of the neat things we found was that there was plenty of apartment communities that would assist you in making the transition from out of state with rent assistance, job search assistance, discount furniture, and so on. In between the whole plan to save save save, we made a few visits to Vegas on our own once we all turned 21. Every visit was all of the fun you could imagine it to be for 3 twentysomething girls. And with every visit came that goodbye which we hated to have to make. It's okay, we'd always say. Someday soon we'll be making that one way trip in to Las Vegas and never look back.
As it does, life got in the way as the years passed. I stopped going to school because the job I had at the time was paying well, and I figured if I was available full-time I could make more money to be able to save for Vegas. Eventually, the job didn't last. I met Louis and managed to convince him that a life in Vegas could be good for both of us. Cindy had met and married someone by the time I had gotten married also, and their plan was to move to Vegas still also. Well they managed to do it and I was very happy for them. Louis figured with his veteran benefits that we could manage to get out there soon enough as well. But our first few years of being married, we experienced some hard times and ended up having to stay with my parents. Nonetheless, we kept trucking along with our moving plan and had it all figured out. Louis would study hotel management at Community College of Southern Nevada with a transfer to UNLV's Hotel Management school for his masters. I could find work as a massage therapist since I had gotten my certification in 2005. In October 2009, a sudden illness took our Priscilla away from this earth. She was a wonderful woman full of drive and ambition who we love and miss dearly. I'll share about her at another time.
In November 2008, our sweet Austin came into the world. At this point, I was starting to lose momentum for Vegas because with each year prior to that which had past, it was another year lost to make the move. I won't get into specifics for personal reasons, but we just couldn't manage to get our shit together. It grew more and more frustrating, so by then I told Louis I'm not going to make any more deadlines as to when we can make the move. Because every year that we did that, we never made the deadline. Sometimes it was his fault, sometimes it was my fault. I told him we just need to have a certain amount of money in the bank, a car, and some contacts for jobs. As soon as all of that was done, then we can go. But now that we had Austin, I knew it was going to be a little more difficult. Not impossible, just a little more difficult. I always had Cindy giving me recommendations to resources that could help us make the move. Even with an infant, as by then she had also given birth to a son. I tried to stay positive, even as we were hearing news that the Las Vegas economy was beginning to suffer at that time. The same way our economy here in California began to suffer, which was making it even harder on us with our finances.
By now, we've realized that Vegas dream isn't likely to pan out. Louis is already in school here for hotel management, and is almost ready to transfer to state to get the bachelor's degree. Austin needs to start school this fall. And I've got to do something worthwhile with myself because my luck with work hasn't been the greatest. It's the hand we were dealt, and I'm too tired to blame anyone or anything in particular now. What's done is done, and all we can do is make a new ending from this point. It just stings every now and then because I feel that I failed big time. A Vegas move couldn't have been that difficult. If Cindy and her husband Oscar did it, why couldn't we? I was and never will be jealous of my friend because even though they made it, the path wasn't easy. Maybe Louis and my path wouldn't have been easy either. But it just didn't happen. Maybe it didn't happen for the better of our sake. But I still feel like we could make it happen. I don't want to say the Vegas dream is completely over. Just because the three of us are going to school here doesn't mean we can't finish out there. Despite what the news is saying, people are still moving there and making waves towards their goals. I don't know exactly what it is that draws me to live there. It's not the gambling because if it was I'd be broke and never get anywhere. For as many times I've visited, I've managed to make my way around town and discover a some neighborhoods. I got a real good feel for certain neighborhoods during the one year Louis and I managed to meet with realtors and got to tour some condos. And the year we spent planning our wedding helped us discover as well. I developed a great liking for the Meadows Mall, and wanted us to settle into the Summerlin neighborhood. It's the perfect little suburbia with beautifully affordable homes, great schools and shopping, reminded me of the nice parts of Orange County. Except there's a huge desert in the background. Another option was Henderson/Green Valley area, which is where Cindy and Oscar settled. I've even tried convincing my parents to move or retire there so that we could all continue to be close by each other. They liked the sound of it. But theirs is another story, and of course I know my dad wants to retire from Disneyland in a few years. Anyhow, I don't know if it's just the allure of saying that "I live in Las Vegas" is what draws me. I don't know if it's the pretty neon lights that are always free to look at and to just take a walk down The Strip for amusement, hanging out in the luxurious hotels, eating in the nice restaurants. I don't know what it is. I just love it. Every time we go, I like to stay at least 4 days. I love rolling in to town, whether by car or airplane, and I'm a droopy mess when it's time to come back to L.A. It's my home away from home.
Of course, there are cons next to a list of pros. Vegas is hot, always is. But I can manage. If the people of Vegas have gotten used to it their whole lives, then so can we. I grew up adoring the Southern California beaches and having the advantage of only being 25 minutes away from the nearest one. There are no beaches in Las Vegas. The closest thing to water recreation is Lake Mead. Disneyland has always been fun, and we've never had to pay for a ticket our whole lives that my dad has been working there. And we still won't have to pay once he retires. Sure, there's the Adventuredome at Circus Circus. But it's not Disneyland. Norwalk isn't the greatest town, but I love that I have the excitement of L.A. and Hollywood close by if I want it. I still love going up north to visit family and only having an average 6 hour drive. And to tell the truth, I've even contemplated living somewhere near the coast up there one day. Next to Vegas, the beach has always been my sanctuary.
Everywhere I would want to settle here in California is gonna cost a pretty penny. Las Vegas' cost of living isn't as bad as it is here. Both dreams are only impossible if I make them impossible. I don't know where we're gonna end up. Maybe there will be a sign one day. Maybe I'll make enough money eventually that I can just buy one of those lovely timeshare condos in Vegas so that we can visit more often. There are some which give you that ability, we've researched it ;o) But dammit, I'd still love to have that gorgeous house in Summerlin. Ugh, well only time and circumstance can tell now. I just know I don't want to be sticking around here in Norwalk for the rest of my life.
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